Title: The Greatest of These (Part 5 of the Indiscretion Series)
Author: heathervamped
Email: heathervamped@yahoo.com
Rating: 12
Pairing: Willow/Giles
Diclaimer: Joss owns the characters and all the rights and gets all the money.
Summary: Rupert celebrates a special occasion.
Rupert rummaged through the top drawer of his dresser, intent on finding a certain tie clip to wear to dinner that evening. It seemed only fitting that he should wear a gift from his wife on the occasion of their first anniversary. But where was it? His hand closed on the hard corner of a small object in the back of the drawer. Hoping it would prove to be the case for his tie clip, he pulled it out. To his amazement, instead of a box, he found that he held a small picture frame.
It was a group shot, taken shortly before he left Sunnydale after Buffy's resurrection. He must have left it here in England when he returned to the States, and now here it still was, rediscovered at last, though he had been back in this house a full three years. Rupert drifted over to the bed and sat down, still gazing at the picture in his hand. They were all in it: Buffy, Dawn, Xander, Anya, Tara, and Willow. His sweet Willow, still untainted by the darkness, but no longer innocent, having touched the unearthly powers that had pulled her friend from the grave. He had not thought of that child in quite some time.
It seemed ages ago that she looked like that. The battle with the First had changed them all, not necessarily for the better. If he thought about it for too long, he could still recall the hurt he had felt on his arrival at Buffy's home in the midst of the preparations to find Willow already beginning a new relationship with one of the potential slayers. No matter how much he told himself that it was his own fault, for it was he who had insisted that she leave his love behind her when she returned home from her stay with him, he could not help his anger.
He hid it from her, of course. She tried to talk to him, to ask if he wanted her to break it off, seeming desperate for him to insist that she do just that, but he could not. Instead, he encouraged the new romance, knowing that finding happiness with another young woman would be seen as the natural order of things where Willow was concerned, and would not raise any eyebrows during this dangerous time. Perhaps had it just been for the sake of not rocking the boat, Rupert could not have stood seeing his love with the potential, but Kennedy was strong, stronger that he was, and he wanted as many strong people as possible interested in protecting Willow until the very end.
Against all odds, the battle had been won, and among those still standing were both Willow and Kennedy. By this time, they had been publicly considered a couple for several months, and Rupert found it to be impossible to simply swoop in and claim Willow for his own after so long. To make matters worse, he had no idea if she would even welcome his advances. What had started out as a desperate attempt to assure her friends that everything was status quo, appeared to have developed into genuine affection.
If it hadn't been for a single embrace when they met outside by the bus to flee Sunnydale and realized that they were both still alive, he would have been content to let her live her life with her new girlfriend, with no interference from him. Yet it had happened, leaving him with the tiniest sliver of a possibility that she had not forgotten what they once shared.
In that first moment of supreme relief on seeing each other unharmed, all the carefully guarded secrets and indifferent acts were forgotten and they fell into each others arms, holding on for dear life. As they pulled back to look at each other, Rupert instinctively began to dip his head to kiss her, and for just an instant, Willow tipped her own head back and parted her lips in invitation. Then, at nearly the same time, they pulled away, eyes wide and horrified, looking around to see if anyone noticed what had almost happened. No one did. They all clambered onto the bus, urging the stragglers to hurry, and the moment was lost forever.
They drove to LA first, to give Angel and the others news of the victory and reassurances that Buffy still walked among the living. From there they made travel arrangements to whichever corner of the globe most interested them. Rupert found that he wanted nothing more than to just go home. In spite of his temptation to follow Willow wherever she chose to go, and in spite of his disappointment that she ultimately picked a location on the other side of the world from him, he was still relieved to be back in familiar surroundings when his plane touched down in England.
At first, like the others, he rested, feeling a vacation well deserved. After not very many weeks the restlessness set in and he busied himself rebuilding the Watcher's Council from the ground up. A worthy activity in his view, with all the suddenly active slayers that would need guidance in their fight against the remaining evil in the world.
About a month after the Sunnydale gang went their separate ways, he received his first letter from Willow. All at once he was no longer able to pretend that he had not thought of her every day with a desperate longing unrivaled by any emotion he ever experienced. What hurt most of all was that she was the last to contact him. Even Xander had sent him a small package with an artifact he had come across in Africa that he thought Rupert would appreciate. He spoke with Buffy and Dawn on the phone every week, and when he managed to remember how to check his email, he always had messages from the newly-made slayers, and even an occasional update from Faith.
The letter could be considered neither long, nor short, but it was completely Willow. He could hear her voice in his head as he read it, telling him of her new apartment and the people she'd met. It turned out that, along with a few other magic users, she'd spent some time on another plane of existence, which accounted for her delay in writing to him. She mentioned Kennedy only once, just to say that she had received a mild concussion being jumped by three vampires, but that she was recovering as quickly as one would expect of a slayer. Rupert couldn't decide if the lack of detail on the girl was to spare his own feelings or because there just wasn't much to say. He tended towards the former, knowing that the life of a slayer was seldom dull or uneventful.
He read the letter twice, before folding it up and wandering around his home looking for a suitable place to stash it. In his bedroom he nearly put it under his pillow, but snatched his hand away at the last moment and rolled his eyes at himself, determined not to be such a sap. At last, he tucked it away in his dresser, deciding that he could relocate it later, if it became necessary.
That evening, he sat down at the large, old desk in his study to compose a response. Just the greeting line produced several crumpled pages as he discarded a number of possibilities that he judged might give the wrong impression. His first attempt, “Dearest Willow,” flowed naturally from his pen, yet the moment he imagined Kennedy plucking the unattended page from wherever Willow might set it down and reading that line, he knew it wouldn't do. “Dear Willow,” though a standard opening, left him with the same horrifying paranoia of Kennedy divining his true feelings. “Greetings Willow,” sounded for all the world like a holiday card. He fetched the letter she wrote to him, hoping for inspiration, but her cheery “Hey Giles,” just didn't work in reciprocation. At last he simply wrote her name at the top of the page, hating how cold it looked there with no salutation, but unable to do better.
He tried to keep the feel of the letter much like hers, giving her newsy updates of his progress with the new Council and the latest on Buffy, in case they had not been in touch since her return to this reality. He mentioned a particularly nice ride he'd had on his horse, barely admitting to himself that he hoped to stir a memory in her that he had no business prodding at all. In the end, he could not help admitting that he missed her, though he covered it as best he could by claiming that he missed all his Sunnydale family.
Her second letter came before he even dared to start hoping for one. This time, she acknowledged their past enough to ask after the horse she had been so fond of and to mention that she regretted not having had the opportunity to ride since her stay with him. There was no mention of Kennedy. Rupert was not so foolish as to hope that this meant the other girl was out of Willow's life. That sort of news she surely would have given him. He decided she simply wanted to spare him from any further reminder that Kennedy was indeed still part of her life.
While waiting for a third letter, or perhaps a phone call, as he had invited Willow to ring him at any time, Rupert's imagination made a devious attempt to read further into the omission of Kennedy in her correspondence. If the relationship was doing well, wouldn't she do her best to make that clear to him so that he did not have to sit and wonder if he would ever have another chance? Could her silence on the subject of her girlfriend be a quiet invitation for him to make a move? The rational side of Rupert's mind quickly spoke up, putting an end to such foolishness. There was no reason to assume that Willow knew that he still carried a torch for her that would need extinguishing with assurances of her happiness with Kennedy. Further, wasn't her continued residence on a different continent evidence enough that she was not inviting his overtures?
As the days passed, and Willow's voice failed to greet him each time he snatched up his ringing phone, Rupert feared that he had been too bold in his last letter and scared her off. Wishing he had made a copy of it, he went over everything he remembered saying in his head many times, but could not come up with anything in particular that could have been construed as a come-on.
Soon he had to put such fears to the back of his mind. Buffy and Dawn were due to arrive in a few days to visit him and meet the children from around the world who were coming to be introduced to their future Watchers. The preparations kept Rupert quite busy and he wished his own capable slayer would have come earlier to help him.
All of his hastily trained Watchers had their hands full with the girls that had convened in Sunnydale as potentials in the fight against the First. They had quickly realized that in addition to the girls that were old enough to become active slayers should Faith be killed, there were many other, younger girls, who were too young to be called and had not been identified as potentials by either the Bringers, or the Watchers Council. However, Willow's spell had not discriminated by age and stories of toddlers and grammar school children displaying incredible strength began to crop up around the world.
One of the primary duties of the new Council was to watch for these stories and contact the parents to head off any serious problems or misunderstandings. Rupert felt fairly confident that they had now reached all of the girls and their parents, though more would likely be born in a few years. The next step was to bring them all together so that they could be educated to understand the duties of the slayers and the responsibilities that came with the supernatural strength. They had scheduled a week long retreat for this first get together. The parents would continue to raise their children until they were old enough to become active slayers. By that time, the currently active slayers would either begin to retire, or those that desired to continue the fight would be mature enough to go out on their own without the need for constant guidance.
Rupert felt like his entire existence was spent on the telephone the week before the big event. There were hotel accommodations to confirm, shuttle buses to arrange, and airport greeters to coordinate. He wanted someone from the Council to meet every flight coming in with a slayer on it. There were twenty three over the course of two days.
He had delegated the task of feeding everyone to Andrew, yet he couldn't help checking up on him every few hours. The younger man bore his micromanaging quite well, which made Rupert feel even guiltier about it. At last, his own tasks became too numerous to continue badgering his underlings and he was forced to stop worrying that his guests would be obliged so subsist on candy bars and soda pop.
The night before Buffy and Dawn were scheduled to arrive, he finally got a response from Willow. Another letter, still no phone call. She apologized for not calling, explaining that her international phone service was notoriously unreliable and she had been unable to make a connection to England. Otherwise, there wasn't much substance to the letter. It seemed too formal, almost cold, as if she addressed a college professor, not a friend, and certainly not a former lover.
Rupert couldn't quite put his finger on exactly what it was that made this letter so different, yet it was different all the same. He felt he should write a prompt response, especially given that his time would be so thoroughly engaged for the next week, but he could not imagine how to answer such an unfeeling note.
That night, thoughts of what he could have done to anger Willow plagued him, making sleep elusive. When he picked up Buffy and Dawn at the airport the next morning, he had a difficult time hiding his distraction in spite of his joy at seeing them again. Not too long after they arrived back at his place, he managed to bring Willow up in conversation, asking the girls if they'd heard from her recently. While Dawn rambled on happily about Willow's last email to her, Buffy regarded him with suspiciously narrowed eyes and a knowing smirk. At last, she got him alone.
“I told her she was wrong about you,” Buffy began. When Rupert just stared at her, she continued, “She thinks you don't care about her anymore, but I told her she was crazy. I told her you cared, but you were just too polite to do anything about it.”
“Exactly who and what are we referring to?” Rupert demanded, keeping his voice at a whisper, since he was afraid he already knew the answer.
Buffy grinned at him. “Willow, the love of your life, who else?” She was clearly enjoying his shock at her knowledge.
“I… I don't know what you mean,” he insisted.
Buffy tossed her hair back over her shoulder and gave him a sideways look. “Giles, I'm her best friend. Did you really think she wouldn't tell me eventually?”
“What did she tell you?” he asked, both desperate to know and terrified to know at the same time.
“Everything,” she replied, drawing out the word to give it all the implied meaning she could muster.
“Oh dear,” was all he could say.
Buffy playfully slapped his arm. “Relax, I'm over it. I mean, yeah, at first, it was kinda eww, but I can see it now. You're both the brainy type and you've always been one of the few people that knows how special Willow really is.”
Rupert was speechless.
“Too bad you went and screwed it up.”
“I… what?”
“Three months and you haven't even tried to see her? It's no wonder she thinks you've moved on. What else is she supposed to think when you don't even invite her to come for a visit. It wouldn't kill you to send her a plane ticket.”
“She's spoken to you of me?” Rupert asked, finally catching on.
“Hello? Isn't that what I've been saying? She thought you'd come for her once you got things settled here and you never did. You haven't even told her that you still love her. Of course, that'd be totally obvious if she could see you like this.”
“She wanted me to… I don't understand. Why is she in Brazil with Kennedy if she still wants to be with me? She does – she does still want to be with me?”
Buffy sighed. “Yes, she wants to be with you. She loves you. But you know Willow. Miss Insecurity. When you didn't make a move before we all left LA, she just figured you wanted to get on with your life, so she tried to get on with hers. Eventually, she told me the whole story and I told her there was no way you could just forget about her like that and I was sure you would go after her any time. But, here you are, still moping around thinking that she doesn't love you when you haven't given her the slightest reason to!”
Rupert shifted his weight, uncomfortable as he considered the events of the last few months from Willow's point of view. In his effort to spare her the pain of imagining that he missed her, he'd made her think that he no longer desired her. It was the last thing he wanted to do, yet he'd thought it best for her. Buffy's words slowly sank in. Willow loved him? After all this time, he remained in her heart and her coldness came not from her lack of feeling toward him, but from her assumption that he lacked feeling for her. It was a tragic error, and one he felt spurred to correct immediately.
He looked at Buffy, the very person whom he'd tried so hard to shield from the whole messy business. A lump of gratitude formed in his throat as he realized that he owed this sudden hope for his future happiness to her. He hugged her impulsively, and she patted his back, giggling softly.
“What should I do?” he asked her, suddenly unsure of his next move. He couldn't risk screwing things up again.
“Well, first, show me where your computer is.”
He led her into his study and showed her the ancient PC set up in the corner. After grumbling about how long it took to start up, Buffy quickly accessed her email account while Rupert busied himself examining his mail, pretending not to be curious about what she was up to.
After several minutes, she shut down the machine and turned to him with a triumphant smile. “Ok, be at the airport tomorrow at 7 pm. Willow will be there.”
Rupert opened his mouth but no sound came out. He had a fleeting thought that tomorrow was his last day before the young slayers began to arrive and he had a lot to do, but that thought was quickly drowned out by a thousand other thoughts that clamored and cavorted about in his brain expressing their thrill at the prospect of seeing Willow again.
Seeming to understand his wordless mouthing, she explained, “I tried telling her that if she would just come to see you she wouldn't have any more doubts about how you felt, but it didn't work. So then I told her how much I could use her help with the little slayers next week and how easy it would be for me to be able to see you and her at the same time without having to take two trips. She made me promise I'd check things out with you first and let her know whether or not it seemed like you wanted to see her. She bought the plane ticket and was just waiting to hear from me. I just told her that you were wasting away, pining for her love and that she better get here right away.”
Rupert gasped and was about to protest, but Buffy just laughed at him. “I'm kidding. I did tell her that you asked about her two seconds after we got in the house and had all the signs of love gone wrong and she better come fix it.”
“You're quite the meddler, young lady,” Rupert said, trying to be stern. Buffy raised an eyebrow at him and he caved. “What can I ever do to thank you?”
Her lips twitched in a self-satisfied smirk. “Just make her happy. Oh, and don't freak out when you meet my new boyfriend.”
Surprised by the change in subject, Rupert tried to extract more information, but Buffy wouldn't budge and told him he'd just ought to worry about Willow and how he was going to make things up to her.
She arrived the next day, on schedule, and Rupert did his best to show her how very glad he was to see her, while still respecting that, as far as he knew, she was still in a relationship with Kennedy. Her own greeting was at least as enthusiastic as he could have hoped, while also apologetic for coming on such short notice. He assured her than nothing could be a more pleasant surprise.
A sense of many things unsaid remained between them all evening until the Summers sisters bid them goodnight and they were left alone at last. Remembering his manners, and her preference, Rupert offered her white wine, which she gratefully accepted. Before long, they were able to speak more easily and frankly of the miscommunications that had passed between them over the last year.
At last, satisfied of his genuine desire to have her by his side, Willow admitted that she herself wanted nothing more than for them to finally be together with no secrets, no grief, and no pretense between themselves or with the rest of their acquaintances. If he would have her, she would not even return to Kennedy, but would instead send for her things and break it off with the other girl as gently as possible from a distance.
“It seems rather cold. As much as I can't bear the thought of you leaving my side, she cared for you for quite some time,” Rupert said, his conscience bothered at being the cause of the other girl's heartbreak.
Willow shook her head, dismissing his fears. “She'll understand. I think she even knew, when I told her I was coming here, that I might not be back.” She took a breath, hesitating before she explained the rest. “Our relationship hadn't been… exclusive since we left LA. It was never meant to be, it just was, sort of by default in Sunnydale. I mean, small town, not exactly bursting with people practicing any kind of alternative lifestyle, if ya know what I mean, so I didn't have much competition.”
Rupert bravely resisted the urge to polish his glasses as he contemplated Kennedy finding other young ladies to practice her alternative lifestyle with in Brazil. “I see,” was all he said.
Willow giggled and poured him another glass of wine, which he gratefully accepted. “She'll be disappointed, don't get me wrong. We had some fun together. But don't think this is going to shatter her world or anything. She might even be happy for me. I think she always knew that I wanted something a little more serious in a relationship and she's just not ready for that.”
“She is very young,” Rupert agreed.
Moments later, the young slayer was the furthest thing from his mind, along with the rest of the world, because Willow was kissing him and he was kissing her right back and the year they had been apart melted away bringing their past into the present moment making it feel as if she had never left his arms.
There was never any question of setting up a spare room for her. She joined him in his bed that night, and for every night that followed, whether they made love or not. That first night, being with her again, Rupert's worst fear was that he would wake up and find that it was all just some precious fantasy that he would never live out. But each time he closed his eyes, when he opened them, he saw green eyes looking up at him, loving him, and he thought he might die because no one who had ever lived had been as happy as he was then and he wasn't sure it should even be allowed.
In the morning, Dawn did not express the least surprise at their lateness to breakfast, nor their emergence from the same room. On inquiring after Buffy, they learned that she had gone to the airport to stand in for Rupert in greeting some of the earliest flights due to arrive with the young slayers. For a moment, Rupert was horrified at having so neglected his duties, but Dawn assured him that it was the least Buffy could do after providing him with such an obvious distraction.
The week was got through with much difficulty. Rupert hated not spending every moment with Willow, even as he comprehended the importance of getting the children off to a positive start in their lives of supernatural strength, endless dangers, and great destinies. Fortunately, he had trained a very competent group of new Watchers and they eagerly took to their roles, relieving much of his burden to the extent that he was almost sorry to see everyone off at the end of the retreat.
The parents all agreed to return the following year for another week together. They found it reassuring to learn that not only was there nothing wrong with their daughters, but that they were not alone in their situation. Meeting Buffy, who quickly became something of a legend among the group, proved most beneficial in easing their fears. Seeing that she had lived so long being the only slayer provided hope that the new slayers would have an even better chance at survival. In a few years, when the oldest of the children would be ready to begin their training, the retreat would serve as a transfer of custody for those parents willing to leave their daughters with the Watchers Council to fulfill their calling.
At the end of the week, Buffy and Dawn took their leave and jokingly asked if Willow didn't also have a plane to catch or had she forgot to buy a roundtrip ticket? They promised to visit, and especially promised that they would be back for the wedding, which set off a fantastic blush in both their friends.
The wedding took place 20 months later. Buffy and Dawn kept their promise and returned to England for the occasion, which was especially fortunate since they were the maid of honor and the only bridesmaid. Xander walked Willow down the aisle and reluctantly gave her away. Willow hadn't spoken to her parents since they left Sunnydale without her during the brief reign of the First, and she wouldn't have even known where to find them had she wanted to. Andrew stood up with Rupert as the best man and cried through the entire ceremony.
During the reception, Buffy introduced them all to her new boyfriend, the Immortal, though he said they could just call him My Lord. Remembering his promise, Rupert was polite, if flabbergasted by the excessively handsome, energetic fellow. Willow could only shake her head and admit that at least Buffy finally had a boyfriend that she was sure wouldn't try to eat her.
Several of Willow's old friends from the coven, whom she had resumed a relationship with on her return to England, were also present. They spent a large part of the time smiling and giving each other knowing nods. Long over his discomfort, Rupert danced with each of them in turn, delighting in their approval of him.
Faith had been issued an invitation out of courtesy, but sent her regrets, for which Willow was secretly grateful. The two had put aside their differences for a common cause, but she found that it remained difficult to forgive someone for kidnapping her and almost getting Buffy killed a few times, no matter how much time had passed. The slayer did send a gift, a tiny bit of patent leather that took Willow nearly 20 minutes to decipher, but which made Rupert insist on writing her thank you note first.
They honeymooned in Venice, then Paris, in no hurry to return to the demands of their Council duties. As they stood together one night, staring up at the brightly lit Eiffel tower, Willow whispered, “I love you,” not for the first time, and for all the pain of the times they had been apart, Rupert knew that they had finally got it right.
A year later, Rupert still had the pleasure of those three little words from the lips of his sweetheart whenever he desired to hear them. She was no longer the girl in the picture that he had fallen in love with, but she was now something better: the woman who loved him back. Suddenly, he realized that if he wanted to have a happy anniversary, he'd better find that tie clip.
He put the picture back where he'd found it, hoping that he would find it again another day and have the same pleasure of fond recollection. A few minutes more of searching produced the elusive accessory. He stood before the mirror and attached it, then hurried from the room. His wife was waiting.
~End~
Back to heathervamped's stories